DUBLIN: International supergroup 'U2' have announced details of their long-awaited new album. The recording, entitled "U2 Unplugged", is in fact completely silent for the full duration of its 72 minute run time.
"All over the world, people stand together united in the desire to hear Bono finally shut his face for once", said Roberto Alberto Umbwebwe, CEO of U2's record company. "We believe this album will have strong crossover appeal even to non-U2 fans."
"Our research shows that most people would pay good money to be spared yet another one of Bono's tiresome lectures, and if there's money to be made, we want some of it." he added.
U2 has recently drawn criticism for moving their vast fortunes to an offshore tax haven. Fellow band member 'The Edge' commented "It's important that we don't waste a single cent of our hard-earned money on contributing to our national economy, paying for schools, hospitals, and the like, when that money could be better spent buying Bono a new pair of sunglasses to go stylin' in. It's an essential part of spreading the message to ordinary people that they can make poverty history. Of course it would only devalue the point if we were to reach into our pockets ourselves."
Critics have already heaped praise on the new album. "This album of silence is easily the best thing U2 has ever done," said Radio 1's Alex Smash. "Previous albums, while technically very accomplished, suffered by having the all-too-brief moments of genius silence interrupted by long, poorly-performed attempts at music. But since then, U2 has clearly matured considerably, very much focusing on what people want the most, and what the band is clearly best at - nothing."
1 comment:
Ooh! A bit harsh on the Bono there.. that's you off the New Year's Honours list. Not that he has any direct influence on things, but, you know.. connections.
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